Weigh-in 182.2

Hello hello!  Just a couple quick updates.  The numbers are slowly starting to go down again on the scale.

The Running Room Learn to Run Clinic is going surprising well.  Last night we started six reps of running for two minutes and walking for one minute.  I actually survived!  I have found that that way to not hyper focus and then hyperventilate is to concentrate not on my breath, but on the sound our feet make when we hit pavement. Hey, whatever works..

Although no great weight loss (what else is new?), I have noticed I’m trimming down.  My squishy midsection is actually starting to look a little toned.

I feel so incredibly relaxed after a run. I can understand why people get addicted to this.

This little tidbit, I’m not proud to announce, but I have decided to start taking my happy pills once more.  My doc will not be thrilled; on paper my life is pretty good.  However, in my head, not so much lately.  My decision came after I rushed home in the middle of the pastor’s sermon at church, convinced I had forgotten to turn off one of the burners on the stove (turns out I did not), and having put the milk carton away…in the pantry.

Yup.  My focus has been less than stellar and the loneliness was starting to turn into depression.  My son has suggested that I might be ADHD.  His therapist (don’t judge, I’m super proud of him that he is talking to someone about what is troubling him) told him that ADHD is often passed down from a parent.  I think they might be on to something.  My mom, bless her soul, is not the brightest tool in the shed and there are quite a few of my uncles and aunts that have a facial tic.  I always just brushed it off as nervousness, but maybe it really is a neurological thing.

Now, after just one day of back on anti-anxiety meds, I feel so calm and less jittery.  My brain is happily swimming in a sea of serotonin.  I think it’s doing a nice backstroke in there.  Paxil, I love you and hate you at the same time.

So, I’m doing what I need to do to be happy and take care of myself.  The world is a much less scary place when I’m medicated. Probably less scary for those around me too, lol!

Have a great day, all.

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Monday Weigh-in: 181 lbs :)

Will you look at that?  I’m down two pounds, and I’m on vacation! I have also been having an ice cream cone every other day, minus the guilt trip.  Confession: I have not tracked one morsel of food for over a week.  I have just been listening to what my body wants to eat and using that as my guide.

Mind you, I also have not brought any sweets into the house lately. My stress levels have also taken a nosedive since my beloved prodigal has moved out.  I’ve been super chill. Maybe there really is  link between stress levels and weight gain.

I have just finished the last of my protein powder, so we will see what the next week brings.  Drinking protein smoothies in the morning has been great in taking the guess work out of what to feed myself when I get up and it has kept me full until lunch time.

Either or, I am just happy with the loss. Averaging one pound per week is just fine by me.  I’m hoping that next Monday brings me closer to the 170-something mark.  I haven’t seen those numbers in a good long while.

Happy Monday all.

Ziiiiiip!Woohoo!

I am over the moon happy right now.  Last night I was looking through my wardrobe, trying to decide what to wear this morning.  I pulled out a favorite skirt of mine and stared at it longingly.  I have not been able to wear that thing comfortably for some time now.

What the heck, I decided to try it on.  I was preparing myself for the argument my thighs and I would be having as I attempt squeezing into it.  Hey now…what’s this?  It just slid over my thighs and made its way up to my waist without any muss or fuss.   Interesting…but what say you, zipper?  The answer:  ziiiiiip! All the way to the top! Aaaah! Yes!  There’s even a little “give” in the tummy area.

Ok, now how about that nice top I just bought (without trying it on)?  I held on to the receipt because I was certain a return trip to the store to exchange for a bigger size would be in my future.  Here we go, bring on the battle of the arm holes….to my delight, it was a total coup.  My arms willingly fit into the arm holes and stood there, in disbelief in front of the mirror.  I am wearing a size Medium, and it actually looks nice.

Not sure I understand what’s going on.  The numbers on the scale have barely moved, but since I’ve been drinking protein smoothies in the morning, my clothes fit better, and I’m starting to bring items to the seamstress to take in a nip and tuck here and there.

Anybody else have this happen?  What are your thoughts on protein powders?  They seem to be working for me!

Happy Tuesday, all!

Monday Weigh-In: 183 lbs :)

Yay! Its only one pound, but its one pound less.  Tonight I start aquafitness classes again.  That always gets things moving along.

This week I promise to:

  • track every morsel of food I put in my mouth
  • do a Fitness Blender work out each morning. (check the out on Youtube!)
  • take the stairs at work
  • take a walk at lunch time

As mentioned last Monday, my clothes are fitting more comfortably, but the numbers are slow to move on the scale.

I went out for dinner after church last night with a friend and she commented that I seem to have lost weight.  Woohoo! That made my day.

She said that it is showing in my upper body especially.  I too have noticed that I don’t seem as “fleshy”.  My arms are a little smaller and I’m not as thick around the chest area. I know it sounds weird, I don’t know how else to explain it.

I tried on a jacket that a couple weeks ago made me look like the incredible hulk.  You know the look, when you cross your arms over your chest and the fabric is being stretched and squeezed to the point where you’re sure you’re going to hear a loud RRRIIIIIPPP sound.  Happy to report that there’s actually a little give to it and its more comfortable.

Baby steps, but all in the right direction.

Happy Monday all!

Sucker for Punishment?

The short and quick answer to that is “yes”.  So, after my little DIY furniture upcycling was completed on Saturday, I finally had a minute to sit down and enjoy the fruits of my labor.

It was hard work, turning a dark espresso stain dresser into a crisp, clean, white vision of beauty.

white dresser

 

I was pretty content, but then this funny feeling came over me.  This has happened a couple times now.  The only way I can express it is to say that it felt like something was missing.

I’ve been single for a while now and honestly, it never bothered me. I’ve always got some project on the go, or volunteering my time to kids at church, doing my thing on the decorating committee, or just spending time with friends and family.

I was sitting in my living room, admiring my surroundings.  A lot of thought and consideration went into every item in there; it took me months to find the perfect coffee table.

WIN_20170521_204558

In the quiet of my contentment, this thought ran through my head, clear as a bell:  “You know Chrissie, at some point you’re going to run out of projects and you’ll have to face the reality that it’s time you take care of matters of the heart before it’s too late”.

Woah….epiphany or what?  Merriam Webster offers this definition of that a-ha moment.

  • 3a (1) :  a usually sudden manifestation or perception of the essential nature or meaning of something (2) :  an intuitive grasp of reality through something (such as an event) usually simple and striking (3) :  an illuminating discovery, realization, or disclosureb :  a revealing scene or moment.

Oh, it was a revelation, all right.  I was/am dumbfounded.  The truth of why I’m always on the go just kind of snuck up on me. It is time that I focus my energy at meeting someone.  My tried and true excuses did their best to push their way to the surface.  “No! You’re not ready!” and “Wait until you reach your goal weight.  Then you can try.  You probably won’t be successful though.” and of course, the classic “Aren’t you getting a little long in the tooth for this?”

Here’s the thing, I realized that if I wait for the perfect time, it may never happen.  So, I’m back on the online dating wagon.   This time around though, I’m going about it like every other project in my life; with patience, reseach, thoughtfulness, effort and a positive attitude.  I won’t give up until I’m happy with the end results.

I believe in God’s perfect timing in all things.  Here’s what that looks like – it comes at a time when least expected, all pieces just kind of fall into place naturally, like it was meant to be.  Picture a combination lock if you will.  You know that feeling in your hands when you’re turning the dial, and you feel that tension in the wheel just before you hear the “click” and then your lock is open?  That feeling.

Having started this blog has been an incredible eye opener for me on so many levels.  My creativity is at an all time high.  I am feeling good about myself again.  Most importantly though is that I feel hopeful.  You know that feeling when you’re anticipating something good and it happens?  I wake up now every morning with that feeling.

So, like a butterfly, I’m a work in progress with lot of changes happening.  Can’t wait to see the end results!  Thanks so much for reading and supporting me.

 

 

 

Monday Weigh-In

Happy Monday, all!  So I stepped on the scale this morning and….I lost! Official weight: 182.8. Woot woot!  That’s more like it.

It’s a holiday weekend here and I spent most of it refinishing a dresser I just could not bear to part with.  It was very labor intensive, ate up most of my weekend, but now it is finished and I’m super happy with it.  Quality products are definitely worth it.  I’m sure I can get a few more years out of this dresser. It has such a nice clean, crisp look to it now.  There’s something about white furniture in a bedroom that is so soothing for me.

Gotta run, heading out to mom’s for a little visit.

 

5:30 a.m. and I’m…..running?!

Happy Friday all!  Let me be the first to say that I have no freaking idea what got into me this morning.  I first woke up at about 4:30 a.m. (thank you, kitty….I’ll get you back, just you wait).  Then I lied there, collected my thoughts, and snuggled in a little tighter beneath the duvet.

While my brain was enjoying warmth of the covers and the cool crisp air blowing though my window, the rest of me was up and pulling on my workout clothes and lacing up my shoes.

Wait…what?? My son looked at me like I was having a stroke.  “Uhm…going for a run?.. mom?”   And just like that, I was out there, pounding the pavement.  My body felt great, but the voice in my head was saying “What in the world are you doing to me, woman?” I could not believe I was out there, so early, doing this.

The great thing about this morning’s motivation – no pressure.  I just got up and did it.  I will not lie to you and say I’m a fantastic runner.  I hate it.  I have a hard time controlling my breathing, but I hear that comes with practice.  My goal today was just to get up, get out and do one lap around the block.  I ran, walked, ran.  I survived.  Let’s see what tomorrow brings!

So far this week I’ve done one aquafit class, one trip to the gym and one run.  Hopefully the scale will be kind to me Monday morning.  Stay tuned and have an awesome weekend!