Sucker for Punishment?

The short and quick answer to that is “yes”.  So, after my little DIY furniture upcycling was completed on Saturday, I finally had a minute to sit down and enjoy the fruits of my labor.

It was hard work, turning a dark espresso stain dresser into a crisp, clean, white vision of beauty.

white dresser

 

I was pretty content, but then this funny feeling came over me.  This has happened a couple times now.  The only way I can express it is to say that it felt like something was missing.

I’ve been single for a while now and honestly, it never bothered me. I’ve always got some project on the go, or volunteering my time to kids at church, doing my thing on the decorating committee, or just spending time with friends and family.

I was sitting in my living room, admiring my surroundings.  A lot of thought and consideration went into every item in there; it took me months to find the perfect coffee table.

WIN_20170521_204558

In the quiet of my contentment, this thought ran through my head, clear as a bell:  “You know Chrissie, at some point you’re going to run out of projects and you’ll have to face the reality that it’s time you take care of matters of the heart before it’s too late”.

Woah….epiphany or what?  Merriam Webster offers this definition of that a-ha moment.

  • 3a (1) :  a usually sudden manifestation or perception of the essential nature or meaning of something (2) :  an intuitive grasp of reality through something (such as an event) usually simple and striking (3) :  an illuminating discovery, realization, or disclosureb :  a revealing scene or moment.

Oh, it was a revelation, all right.  I was/am dumbfounded.  The truth of why I’m always on the go just kind of snuck up on me. It is time that I focus my energy at meeting someone.  My tried and true excuses did their best to push their way to the surface.  “No! You’re not ready!” and “Wait until you reach your goal weight.  Then you can try.  You probably won’t be successful though.” and of course, the classic “Aren’t you getting a little long in the tooth for this?”

Here’s the thing, I realized that if I wait for the perfect time, it may never happen.  So, I’m back on the online dating wagon.   This time around though, I’m going about it like every other project in my life; with patience, reseach, thoughtfulness, effort and a positive attitude.  I won’t give up until I’m happy with the end results.

I believe in God’s perfect timing in all things.  Here’s what that looks like – it comes at a time when least expected, all pieces just kind of fall into place naturally, like it was meant to be.  Picture a combination lock if you will.  You know that feeling in your hands when you’re turning the dial, and you feel that tension in the wheel just before you hear the “click” and then your lock is open?  That feeling.

Having started this blog has been an incredible eye opener for me on so many levels.  My creativity is at an all time high.  I am feeling good about myself again.  Most importantly though is that I feel hopeful.  You know that feeling when you’re anticipating something good and it happens?  I wake up now every morning with that feeling.

So, like a butterfly, I’m a work in progress with lot of changes happening.  Can’t wait to see the end results!  Thanks so much for reading and supporting me.

 

 

 

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